We grow up hearing that our ideas, projects and goals should not be disclosed – someone will steal from you. Right?
We grow up thinking that we have to do everything ourselves.
I myself was influenced by this concept and would not comment to anyone about my projects.
This way of thinking protects us in 2 ways:
- nobody will take our idea and do it before we do
- if we fail, nobody will know
It sounds interesting, but the truth is, it’s not that good.
The unshared deadline
The projects I wanted to do and I didn’t tell anyone. The new things I want to do but I didn’t tell anyone. The new habits I want to develop and I didn’t tell anyone. I lost most of them.
I didn’t have the ideas brought up by other people. The ideas of others that would have added to the project or the habits or the accountability that would have been created, is all lost.
But does this really make sense? What is the thing that stops you? Is there really always someone on hand to pull your rug?
If you feel that way, switch your circle of friends. Not telling your friends – the real ones, those who support you and want your evolution – just doesn’t give them the opportunity to enjoy such an important moment with you.
It’s also true that of the projects I haven’t counted on, no one has seen me fail. After all, what’s the point of that? Many I didn’t even fail, I just gave up before starting. If I had friends supporting me, I might not have gone through with it; perhaps the flaws would have been overcome with the help of those who want to see me well; perhaps many projects would have taken different and better paths.
And the true power of the shared deadline
Do you already know where you want to go? In some cases, all we need are friends, partners, good people who are there to push us forward, to pull our ears when we need to, to be honest, to demand our evolution and not let us stagnate.
I remember the time when I really wanted to go for a 15-20 km jogging. But I was not pushing myself enough to wear the shoes and go to the tracks. After months ignoring it, I shared the thing with few of my friends. they pushed me hard to go for once only. And next, I completed the day with 15.84 km. Then they forced me to share my steps tracker screenshot on my Whatsapp status to a selected group of friends with a message “Next weekend I will be going for a 20 km.” The result: I went multiple times for this long runs and I quickly reached 32 km in few weeks.
The shared deadline can be interesting, as long as your friends really want you well and see you reaching your goals. You don’t need to tell everyone or the most important ones. You need to hand-pick who would be excited about the project, who would want to see you happy to finish this project, who would be willing to give you a push in this case.
But look, it’s no use just playing any day, ok? Plan your project well before leaving to share anything. Use schedules , divide your tasks well , have task managers , focus on activities , share the deadline and do what needs to be done .
Receiving a shared deadline
When we participate in a shared deadline on the other side of the coin, it’s also amazing.
Asking a friend how the process is going, seeing the thing go and happening, seeing your friend beaming that everything went well, being nearby and watching from the box. Priceless life experiences.
Believe me, timeshare is a magical business. We don’t want to stick with our deadline because everyone already knows the final date, we have amazing people who help and encourage us, in the end we gain extra gas in this combo.